i promise

bismillah.

/
i promise
that I won't let down myself again.

its been a while for me, not be able to write in this blog, and it kind of something that I lost.
something that currently helps me to heal and  soothing my heart.

i admit,
i am an alien who live in this world.
i am weird.
doing anything by my own. not because i am capable to do all those thing,
but it is just me who hardly to lend at others.

okay, nvm.

what im trying to say is,
for those people who helps me,
im really grateful for all those kindness and all.

but, the only thing that im afraid of is,
is a failure.
you guys already did great to fix me,
it is me who can't do.

i fail.

im sorry,
but believe,
im trying my best to be better.

/
and for you,
im not trying to go away,
but I think, leaving is the only way for me to not hurt you and myself anymore.
im sorry, for just left like that, and do like nothing happen.
im sorry for being selfish.
i just don't want you to be kind on me just because of pity.

i am okey.