you have to do it even your heart say don't

as I become older and older, my age become increase year by year, it is obviously that many thing that I need to face up in order to live well. 

yes, the struggle is real. and reality is the big deal to face up. 

and I know, even my heart say that I don't want to did that, but still my body move contradictory with what my heart wants. still, mind controls everything indeed. 

..

usually, when Ibu and Ayah sent me off at the airport, I don't really feel like crying or what, but today, in the morning, when Ibu and Ayah wanna sent me off, my eyes winking some tears and I feel so so sad like I can't even describe it. I think a lot. 

on the way to the airport, my mind full of things that I don't really want to think off. but still, I had to think all the reasons why I need to do this. it is just like I need on something or a solid reason for myself so then I won't feel anything that can make me feel regret on doing what I need to do. 

it is already 2 years and half. 

but still, for me to plant the redha of all this thing aren't easy. 

so I came out with a few reasons why I need to do this. 

1. it is for Ibu Ayah to be happy. 

2. they do much for you and you need to repay them.

3. you need a good job in order to bring them to a nice place in future. 

4. you need to make them proud on you. 

and I really need to bear all this things so then I can archive all of this soon.

I can do this :)

for Ibu Ayah's sake.